Jamie and I had been in pretty constant contact since we had last seen each other. It had been a good year. We were fuelled with positive vibes so we got a crazy idea. We wanted to spend a week in New York City. Jamie had a good job and I was doing pretty well too… this seemed very doable. So we booked a week in January of 2006 to spend time in the Big Apple. We had rough plans about the things we wanted to see. We had tentatively planned a few museums, the Apple Store (0f course), Ground Zero, one fancy night out and whatever else came our way.

We were to meet at the hotel and then we would plan what to do. I got there first and the hotel reception could not let me in the room because Jamie didn’ t know that my name needed to be listed as the other person in the room. I was fine though, it was a great hotel and the lobby was nice. I sat and looked through the magazines to see what was happening in the city that week. I saw a play that interested me, A Touch of the Poet by Eugene O’Neill. I was not interested in this play for any other reason than it had one of my favourite actors starring in the lead, Gabriel Byrne. I love him! I wanted to see this play so badly. I also learned that where we were staying, On The Ave, on the upper west side of NYC was a stomping ground for Cynthia Nixon of Sex and the City. I was freaking out because I loved the show and I would have died to see her. It was a good hour and a bit that I sat in the lobby waiting for Jamie to call my cell to let me know he was ok, I had a lot of time to formulate plans on what we should do…and stare out the window wondering if I saw Cynthia Nixon would I have the guts to ask if I could be her nanny. Haha!

When Jamie finally called I was so relieved to hear his voice. I let him speak to the front desk to verify that I was the other person in the party so they could let me in the room. The room was so nice. It had two queen sized beds, a big tv, and not a bad view. It was cozy and I couldn’t wait for him to get there. Then the butterflies started… and I couldn’t sit still. I unpacked and claimed a side of the room. I hung up my new dress, vintage cut and amazing, I called it my “Sex and the City dress”. I looked for ages to find the perfect dress to wear for our fancy night out. I wanted to look beautiful for him and this dress was a winner.

I needed to calm down, I kept thinking of what it would be like to see him. The thought of Jamie always twisted me up inside. No matter what was going on in my life he was my bright spot. The spot that I focused on. When I was able to be in his presence it was overwhelming and yet somehow I was peaceful. I decided to lie down and rest because he still had to get through customs and get to the hotel from the airport. Then I heard it… the key card in the door. He was there, we were in New York City together.

After a few hugs and some catch up time we decided to go out for a bite to eat. There was a diner right across from our hotel and it had a great view of Broadway. This diner became our favorite spot for a late night coffee and a treat. The service was so good and the food was fabulous. As we sat there eating I remember thinking how easy it was. I had missed him and it was going to be a great week. I let him know about the play and he agreed that it would be the perfect play to see knowing, in Jamie’s words, that I had a “major crush on Gabriel Byrne”. When we got back to the hotel J brought out his laptop and booked the tickets. I was freaking out.

Over the week we spent in the city we saw and did so many things. We chose a different area of Manhattan to explore each day. We went to Ground Zero and saw the Statue of Liberty. I was feeling very patriotic that day.

There was a trip to the Natural History Museum and Central Park. I don’t think Jamie put his camera down the whole day.

Late night walking around was a must too. The city completely changes at night.

South St. Seaport was crazy! It was so warm that day…

We also window shopped on 5th Avenue. Tiffany’s for me and the Apple store for him. I don’t think that there was a place in the city that we didn’t see.

When it was the day to see the play I was so excited. I loved seeing Broadway shows. It was one of the things that made me love NYC so much. I was having such a good time with Jamie already and doing something I was familiar with was going to be nice to share with him.  Jamie hadn’t told me about the location of our seats but I figured they would be in the balcony, that was where the nice cheap seats are for the matinees. When we got to the theater I realized we were on the main floor and as we were walking to our seats I kept thinking we were going to stop any row now. I remember hearing Jamie say “just keep going, keep going” as we walked down the aisle towards the stage. I was completely shocked at where we were actually sitting, 5 rows from the front. I was so amazed by what he had done for me. We both agreed that they were probably the best seats in the house. The play was extremely well done and I could see Gabriel so well. It simply was the best day.

On the night before we left we realized that we hadn’t worn our fancy clothes to go out. We had been so busy all week and we really didn’t know what a dressy night out would involve so we kept putting it off. By the last night we knew it was too late to make plans so I suggested we just get dressed up in the hotel room. We split up, Jamie stayed in the room and I went to the bathroom to change. Jamie put on his suit and I put on my fancy dress and very high heels and then entered the room. We looked at each other for a minute and I thought how handsome and grown up he looked. I marveled at how he had changed since we were kids. We looked so nice but had nothing to do. I went over to the cd collection that I brought and pulled out a nice mellow cd. I asked him if he wanted to dance… from then on we didn’t talk much. We danced and danced for ages, I didn’t want the evening to end. I kept thinking to myself, how I wished he would kiss me. I wondered what it would be like after all of those years. There were moments when we nearly did but then for some reason, that I again don’t to this day understand, it was easier to just bury my head in his chest and keep dancing. It was one of the most romantic evenings we have ever had and we hadn’t even left the room. We had everything we needed there.

It was a trip that I will never forget. We had an absolutely amazing time. We were totally grown up and off doing something big by ourselves. Without hesitation we agreed that we would have to do New York again. I didn’t ever for a moment regret the trip but I did regret not kissing Jamie. I always regretted not kissing him. This trip really brought out the fact that we could say anything to each other when we were on the computer but when we were face to face it was impossible. We both felt the pull and we both buried it until we were home and poured our guts out over instant messenger. Our list of regretful lost moments was getting longer. Why? Why? Why? Why didn’t I just tell him how I felt? Why hadn’t I kissed him? Were we really destined to be this perfect for one another and never get it right? Maybe we still had some more growing up to do. x heather